Holy Cow

Phil Rizzuto is why I listened to Not The Dan Patrick Show today. As much as I don’t care for Michael Kay or Steve Phillips, they spent a lot of time speaking about Rizzuto, who passed away earlier today. Kay and Phillips had many baseball people on the show, which kind of almost made up for another day of the Dan Patrick Farewell Unweek. Rizzuto was a voice in the Yankees broadcast booth when I lived in NYC, so he was a big part of my New York summers. It’s been a long time since I heard a Rizzuto broadcast, but when I read today that he died I felt like I’d lost an uncle.

As a bonus for listening to the show today I got to hear the announcement that Dan will be back tomorrow. I’m assuming this means that Farewell Week will be Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, but with ESPN you never know what you’re going to get.

For non-baseball fans who never understood what was playing on the radio in the background in Paradise By the Dashboard Light, it was Phil Rizzuto calling a Yankee game:

Karl Rove: The Farewell Tour

Inspired by DP’s Farewell Tour, I tried to think of a song that would capture Rove’s departure. The only thing that has come to mind is Boom Boom Out Go the Lights, and only because the departure is so sudden. It wasn’t unexpected, but the news did catch me off-guard.

A song that better captures my feelings about Rove’s influence on politics and what he cursed us with via the Bush administration is Disorder In The House, by Warren Zevon. I can’t find video or audio of the song, so here are just the lyrics. If anyone can come up with a better song to usher Rove out, feel free to chime in.

(Re the tag: Yeah, Rove is headed out the door, but what he brought us and what he leaves us is still horrible and miserable. And it’s not like he’s really gone, as he’s left a load of spawn. ThrillsVille.)

Disorder in the house
The tub runneth over
Plaster’s falling down in pieces by the couch of pain

Disorder in the house
Time to duck and cover
Helicopters hover over rough terrain

Disorder in the house
Reptile wisdom
Zombies on the lawn staggering around

Disorder in the house
There’s a flaw in the system
And the fly in the ointment’s gonna bring the whole thing down

The floodgates are open
We’ve let the demons loose
The big guns have spoken
And we’ve fallen for the ruse

Disorder in the house
It’s a fate worse than fame
Even the Lhasa Apso seems to be ashamed

Disorder in the house
The doors are coming off the hinges
The earth will open and swallow up the real estate

I just got my paycheck
I’m gonna paint the whole town grey
Whether it’s a night in Paris or a Fresno matinee

It’s the home of the brave and the land of the free
Where the less you know the better off you’ll be

Disorder in the house
All bets are off
I’m sprawled across the davenport of despair

Disorder in the house
I’ll live with the losses
And watch the sundown through the portiere

Stephen A. Smith is a Cootie?

rrgirl, in We Wuz Robbed!:

as a kid, I learned when I lifted a rock in a hedgerow or pasture, cooties would scurry over shocking pale roots; the smell was musty and strange. broadcast media reminds me of those rocks. just below the surface, all kinds of strangeness churns and burrows away. whether it’s behind doors or under a rock, ugly stuff stays hidden but it’s all part of the ecosystem: something was decided weeks ago, someone made a deal and it took DP and KO off the air for a while. I believe with all my heart, they’ll be back, better than ever. ESPN, not so much.

OK, so it’s not what you meant. But I’m a tad delirious from DP Deficiency. I put the two together and it occurred to me that there is a resemblance:

But Cooties are much more serene and don’t yell all the time.

Dan Patrick: The Farewell Tour (xxvi) — There will be other songs to sing …

Yeah, other songs to sing, but not on ESPN.